Remember when you first started online dating? Maybe you had just got out a relationship and getting online made you feel alive again seeing a bunch of great looking people with interesting profiles to match. Or maybe you took it upon yourself to change your single status and decided you were going to take the brave leap into online dating. Well, it’s been a few months now, and you’re enthusiasm is starting to disappear. Instead you’re getting frustrated with sending out so many messages and not getting any replies, or you’re tired of fielding a ton of messages from people that just seem content to have idle chitchat online without it going anywhere. Or worse, you’ve been out there dating but everyone you’re coming into contact with is just not the kind of person you’re looking for. Well, it’s time to take a deep breath because you’ve hit your breaking point with online dating and you’re getting burned out. Below we’ve given you some advice on how to handle this, and what to do to get back in the saddle and get out there again.
Time Out – At this point it is important to take a time out. If you’re online dating this can be as simple as removing your photos from the dating site. Doing this will still allow members to find you, but the longer you stay offline, and not have a profile pic up the amount of responses you get will get smaller and smaller. What’s good about this is that you aren’t taking down your full profile, which means at anytime you can update your pictures and you’re off to the races again. So take some time to reassess where you are.
Check Yourself – At this point you’ve most likely been meeting or at least talking to a few different people online. This is a great halfway point for you to stop, take a step back, and assess the kind of people you’ve been dating. I’m sure you probably had a list of what you were looking for before going online, so how did that pan out? Normally you’ll find that the kind of people you thought you’d connect with you don’t, so it might be time to revise your dating list to find out what it is you’re really looking for.
Get Outside – When the weather is good this is the time to get outside and meet people in the real world. So it might be a good time to start to go out to more events around the city or parties hosted by friends and meet real people not profiles. This is a great way to take a break from the online dating world, and use a different social muscle. It will also feel like less pressure to be able to just meet people organically instead of mechanically which online dating can feel like sometimes.
Get Hobbies – You need to love yourself before you can love someone else. It might sound cliché but it is true, if you’re just focused on who you can be for someone else, you won’t know who you are. If you don’t know who you are, how are you going to find someone to match with? So this can also be a great time to find new hobbies or passions. These activities might lead to love or not, it really doesn’t matter because in the end they’ll rejuvenate you and help you paint a better picture of who you are.
Get Back Online – After a few months of online dating vacation, you’ll come back feeling refreshed and ready to get back online. So before you just fire up the profile again, take the time to go through it and see if it makes sense to update it. Chances are with the few months you’ve had off, you’ll want to change a few things about it, and maybe update your photos with some new ones. Then get back out there with the same enthusiasm you had when you first started.
It can take time to meet the right person, and the right attitude makes the difference. So instead of being upset by your single status, enjoy it while you can and be patient. During this time think about what you are really looking for and how realistic that is, with just a change in your mental mindset and perception you can come across a great match for you whom you can work with to build a great relationship.